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narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

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I want to wake up at 2am, roll over, see your face, and know that I’m right where I’m supposed to be.

i love you   (via talom)
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puchiyo:

jawnwatsson:

when martin wants to swear out loud but he cant because he’s john watson

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this makes me chuckle inside

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